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Things we'd like to see this season... |
A few things we'd all like to see this season... from 2003
- Mark Bonnett to play for AP Back of the Net like he does for Phoenix.
- A ban on outfield players wearing sweat bands during a football match.
- Ian Brooks to be institutionalised.
- Garry's Dad (right) to make his debut for Phoenix
- A Mukesh Vatish to openly admit he's gay.
- Nikesh Sawjani to be given a second chance out on pitch.
- Steve Mills to stay vertical for all of the 30 minutes. In every match.
- Garry Georgiades replying to a question about Chris Woodley with 'Thank f*** he's gone'.
- Nancy Dell'Olio to start dating a Phoenix Player.
- Mozza (aka Joe Cole) to play every game for Phoenix so it can finally be concluded if he's the real deal or not.
- Ryan Sweatman to score a goal with his right foot.
- Nikesh Sawjani to return to Phoenix, admitting that being the key player for an up-and-coming club is a far more honourable undertaking than being a bit-part substitute for the richest bank in the land.
- Bunney to reply to a text message.
- Each player to publish the full composition of their wage bill at the end of the season. Can it really be true that Lloyds TSB pay Nikesh Sawjani £30,000 a year?
- Mark Bonnett passing the ball (successfully) forward in the nets.
- Mozza saying: 'Well I can't blame the referee...Or Lady Luck.'
- Garry Georgiades admitting that there is at least one man in the world who could do a better job out on pitch than himself. Even if it's him.
- Steve Mills getting through a whole game - any game - without mentioning 'that night we got to the final'.
- No Phoenix player urinating in a public place.
- Bunney winning the Golden Boot.
- Beautiful, single women to start going to Phoenix matches.
- Ryan Sweatman attempting any manoeuvre more difficult than leaning back, putting his arms out and swinging his left boot.
- Forget the mind games, Garry Georgiades and Safeway Rejects' Tottenham actually coming to real-life blows. Naked. In mud.
- * David Bunney giving Ryan Sweatman a clip around the ear and telling him to 'behave'. And then confirming the incident actually happened.
- Garry Georgiades going on Big Brother
- Mozza to play in a red shirt
- Someone to volunteer to poke off
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